A friend

Some times hearts surprise you with the number of times they can break. Even so, it does get easier after a point to go through it even though a broken heart becomes the only way you can feel whole again. Then some songs come along and just help you slide into it. So you find it easier to sleep with the heart under your pillow, find it outside your window, eat with it as it cracks apart a little more. There are some songs that allow you to be a friend to that heart.

On my mind

Flailing attempts at prose

I invest more in the smaller plans. The big ones, almost never work out. I think I tend to believe that there is some grand plan for each of us and it’s the tiny ones that we are allowed to tinker with. Sometimes I would get glimpses into this big plan at my old house. I would go to the terrace nearly every day in the evening to sit in the sunset. As far as terraces go, it wasn't spectacular. My house was by no means the tallest building. And the time had passed when you could see the sea from the terrace. New buildings had come up by the time I started frequenting the terrace. To my right was one of those big towers? Electric ones? I’m not sure. It was constructed on another tall building. I would always look at that the peak of that tower and wish I could be up there, closer to the sky.  Often, there would be a lone crow sitting up there watching everything else. It looked incredibly lonely to me. But I always sought that even as a child. It was still unsettling. Like the skeleton of something abandoned. Or rather the skeleton of something that would grow only that far. No flesh for this building. So I had this skeletal tower to my right.

In front of me was a big coconut tree-the branches draped themselves over the wall under which I would sometimes hide when I was a child.  When I grew older, that side of the terrace always frightened me. When the sun set and everything was thrown into shadow, that part looked especially dark and impenetrable to me. And yet I always felt like I was being watched from something in there. I always had the sense of something small, female and abandoned sitting there watching me. Sometimes I would leave the terrace, too frightened to stay when it got dark. Later, I decided that I wouldn’t be chased off my own terrace and learned to stay there and face my fears. I remember I would talk loudly to myself telling whomever I thought (of felt) was there that I wasn’t there to hurt them and maybe we could co exist happily. Soon I stopped being frightened and would stay for hours not leaving till I was called for dinner. I think something still waits for me there. That patch of sky above that terrace is mine. My big plan has been written there and its waiting for me to read it.

Playlist V

So happy that they won at the Grammy's!! Though when you think about how irrelevant the Grammy's have become it really shouldn't make a difference. Still, it's quite an acheivment considering that they beat out Katy Perry and some band called Lady Antebellum (ya that's the name). I'm not kidding though, when I say it's an acheivment. After all, when has indie music ever been able to combat the all pervasive (read invasive) nature of pop music? Not that I have anything against pop music. But are you really going to remember Katy Perry for her music ten years down the line? I'm probably going to remember her for having a Hindu (bet they pronounced it hind-ooo) wedding in India for no apparent reason other than you know, India is like, so spirtual! I'm not even going to address the presence of Lady Antebellum- I'm unable to process anything past their ridiculous name.



The quality is weird but I love this song. And Skins! The series showcases some great music.



LOVE his voice.

Passenger

I have definitely featured this artist here before. But I failed to mention how he has completely taken over my life. I first heard Passenger in S's house. It was early last year when I was dabbling in a little unemployment here, a little broke-ness there (you know, just because I like to). I had run away to Madras for 3 weeks in the hopes that someone there would give me a job. Anyway, so on what was the last day (I didn't find a job) we were sitting on the floor of her living room after dinner with at least three laptops open and my ipod all good and ready to steal her music from her when she was like  " Oh my god, Kow! (I don't understand why my friends spell it like that. I guess it's because I'm not a real cow? I can hope.) I have to make you listen to this guy!" I was all like "Yeah yeah in a minute, let me finish taking AIR (J'adore! See what I did?? No..? No?) from you." Anyway, she chuckled, cursed me ( because occasionally we pretend that we're bad ass gangsters who curse as we breathe) and went on with whatever she was doing. Anyway, so I opened itunes and played "The Last Unicorn" and then oh my god Mike Rosenberg's voice filled the room and in an instant I was hooked. Anyway, after that I have listened to the album Wide Eyes Blind Love so many times that on Lastfm I think that I have the highest number of plays for Passenger. Quite an accomplishment.

Anyway, I wish I could convey how much I love this guy. I know there's a band in there but for me it's just him. I often try (and fail) to write about music on this blog. It's just too damn hard. I'd consider it a fine achievement if I could but as I work on that skill why don't you read his interview here (he's also really funny in a way that only Brit's can be) and then go look for his album Wide Eyes Blind Love?

Repeat to self

"The only way out of a feeling is to go through it." -S

This isn't her quote. But it's so much more meaningful to me because it came through her. 

SYTYCD Favourites

Season 7 was a bit of roller coaster. Dancers getting injured, some not so great judging (Mia please go back to choreographing. It was greatly missed, your judging on the other hand will not have the same fate. I still  love you.) and then the controversial decision to take only 10 dancers and pair them up with SYTYCD alumni (given the moniker "the all-stars" umm what??). I recently heard that they will be going back to the old format for Season 8 as the new one didn't bode too well with audiences. I can understand why people had so many problems with the new format though. It's lovely to see the dancers grow on the show and grow with each other. With the new format they were thrown into performing at a level(because they were paired with the much more experienced all stars) that they might not have been prepared for and hence all the injuries. However, this also meant a high caliber of dancing early on and unlike other seasons it has been difficult to choose a favourite because they were all so damn good. The one I have picked for today was an instant favourite of mine.

Ashley moves like water in this piece. And her hair! Oh my gosh her hair was just beautiful. I was really sad to see her go because of an injury. And I am confused. Why was Alex Wong asked to return for the next season and not Ashley? They both had serious injuries right? Hmm.

Anyway, this dance is stunning. And I don't know how Ade does it. He manages to make it look like Ashley is this thistle blowing in the wind. I love everything about this dance. The dancers, the music (Florence + the Machine yay!), the concept, everything. And like Cat said , the moment they almost kiss but then don't is so beautiful. So poignant.

Unfortunately, Youtube is spoiling my fun by refusing to let me embed the video. So go here.